Saturday, May 9, 2015

Well, I'm still here...

Hey, ya'll. Hey, they just tried to change my spelling of ya'll. It's a contraction. It means "you all". I put the apostrophe in the right place.

Anyhow, it is almost summer...it becomes a teacher's favorite time of the year, except there is about four times more work...paperwork, grading, field days, field trips, etc.

I just bought a new washer. I am so ashamed that that is news. However, I love it and try to do laundry pretty much every second I am home. It is amazing. Steam, allergen cycle, every single thing you can imagine...and it looks like the Death Star or something. It can do a load of towels or anything really, in like 20 minutes. UH-MAZING. Next? Matching dryer, new fridge, new dishwasher. This house is falling the hell apart, and I'll be damned if it falls apart with old appliances. OH, and a new countertop. Quartz. Not granite. Everyone has that crap. I have a box of chunks of different granite in my classroom that a geologist gave the students. However, the thought of a ton of second graders carrying around chunks of granite is a scary proposition to me. Imagine the chaos and injuries on the bus, for God's sake. Plus, in this part of Texas, granite is very easy to come by from the actual quarry. Limestone is everywhere, too. It's the bane of everyone's existence. No basements, EXPENSIVE pools..hard to start a good garden unless it's raised bed.

I found a brand new obsession. I mean that in a non frightening way, of course. It's a man, I mean a show with a man in it. It's called "Property Brothers", and I think I am going to marry one of the twins named Jonathan. Why? He is perfect in looks, seems funny, smart and is handy with tools. Win/Win/Win/Win. Google that dude. Tell me he isn't hot. Go ahead. Try. You can't, can you? I didn't think so. His twin is also amazingly good looking, but I can tell the difference, plus he has a girlfriend or some such nonsense and I have devoted my heart to Jonathan. Wallsterham? He doesn't seem to care. Another WIN for me. My children think I've lost my mind. I quickly went from Ryan Gosling to Jonathan. PLUS...he's an interior designer as well as a contractor and producer, etc. Why isn't he mine? No clue. I will try to rectify that....legally, of course.

I have lost a crap ton of weight. I'm using HCG. Try it. It is the best thing ever. You don't even think of food. Weight falls off. Really, really fast. Still healthy. All I eat is salad. I am limited in fruit, protein, and no carbs, fat or sugar. Seems like a pretty reasonable diet, actually. If I do eat something I shouldn't, welllll...my intestines don't appreciate it, and make their disapproval quite obvious. I will be back into high school weight soon. Steroids for my vertebrae and pinched nerves made me do that "fat retaining" bullshit. No matter what I did...run like a freak everyday, enter races, do well, eat healthy, protein shakes, no carbs, no fat, no sugar...nothing worked. So, now...I've been off the steroid for like...I don't know...4 years? Keep the pain in check with a chiropractor...who isn't TAKING MY INSURANCE NOW...AND SHAME ON THEM. I can't do 180.00 three times a damned week. So, I have a hurting neck or back all the time, and they told me no more running. Nothing with any impact. Tell my legs that. Tell my endorphins that. The all salad is my choice...you can eat a certain amount of protein, etc. I just don't do well with a lot of meat. Sushi? Yes please. Just no salmon. Not because I don't like it, but because they say no. I have been craving sushi. That is the only thing. Oh, it's almost Mother's day and I'm attempting to justify a couple of cupcakes. Eat at a restaurant? I'm terrified I would be sick for days.

My father is on his "one last trip to West Texas". Terrified? Yes, indeed. I dreamed about it last night. Plus we are in the Austin area...why go back to the West Texas wasteland? I mean, he tried to call me the other night and the conversation went like this:

Him: "Hey, girl...babble interference...cutting out...babble garble"/ phone cut out.
Me: "DAD??? DAD? ARE YOU OKAY?" I immediately worried that he was having difficulty with his heart. He sounded bad.
Him: "Yeah...I'm...garble garble/cut out of phone."
Me: "Dad???" phone cut out.

Two minutes later: I called him.
Me: "DAD???? ARE YOU OKAY???"
Him: "Oh yeah...Ahm on my way to West Texas...Ahm comin up to Dryden..."
Me: "OMG...THAT IS HORRIBLE!!!"
Him: "Yeah, it's still ere. Next I reckon I'll go rat through Sannerson". (Sanderson...we drop consonants and blend vowels and weird things.)
Me: "Oh, okay...be careful!"
Him: "All rat den..." garble garble. Phone cut out.

Whew.

But, "last trip"? Just shoot me now.

That's all. I have no mother's day plans, or at least my children don't. I want to see my Mom, but she said my brother was grilling for her. However, I've learned to not expect anything, so that way I don't get upset and disappointed. Birthdays and Christmas are the same. I will get a "guilt" gift a week or so later, but really...who wants a guilt gift? Something from the heart...that's perfect. My best ever was when Jack was 4. We went to the Antique Rose emporium, I bought a couple of roses I really wanted, and they had a kid's craft thing for Mother's Day. Jack made me a bookmark with dried flower and herbs in it. I loved it. It was super simple, and I've done it with my students a few times. The mother's day directly after Tyler was born was amazing. I remember I was nursing him and life had been so hectic, that I hadn't had a chance to just sit alone with him and I looked down at his sweet face and it just hit me like a bomb. Unbearable deep love. It just washed over me, and I thought, "Wow...I'm the luckiest woman on Earth". I had two perfect boys. I had two angels to love and care for. Best thing I've ever done. Delivery was almost death with the second. First was a walk in the park, but I'd do either again in a second. Mother's day 1992, I was newly pregnant with Jack. It was the day I first felt him kick. Best gift.

Tomorrow? Nada, I think. I'll have to go splurge and buy myself something I want.

Happy Mother's Day, everyone. Oh, and I haven't edited. Again, I'm no editor.