Step Off Me!

Okay, so today I made a little pit stop at a liquor store to see if they had this particular wine I adore. It was daylight. I was in a part of town not far from home, and in a place that is populated.

By the way, the jackholes didn't have my wine. Anyhow, I go inside. I begin looking. I can find wine. I can read. However, it is someone's job to jump up in front of me and holler, "HI ! CAN I HELP YOU FIND ANYTHING?" I wanted to say, "Yes, do you carry wine?" Because I was you know...in a huge wine store. There was nothing but bottles of wine as far as the eye could see.
I instead said, "No, thank you. I'm just looking."
Liquor guy: "Whatcha lookin' for?"
Me: "Um, a particular wine from a winery my husband and I like..."
Liquor dude: "What winery?"
Me: "Um, it's near Fredericksburg..."
Liquor Dude: "Oh! FREDERICKBURG! Yeah, yeah...a TEXAS wine! Yeah..."
Me: "Yes."
Dude: "What winery?"
Me: "Grape Creek".
Dude: "Don't recognize it. You sure?"
Me: "Um, yes. I was in their monthly shipment deal and received wine every month for a long time....I've been there a couple of times, so I'm pretty sure."
Dude: "Yeah..hmmm...doesn't sound familiar...but here are some other Texas wines.."
Me: "Yeah. I see. Oh well...I guess I'll just order it..."
Dude: "Wait! We can special order it for you!"
Me: "Oh, no...it's not a big deal...really...it's okay..."
Dude: "Have you tried THIS wine?"
He proudly holds up a bottle of wine I can buy at the grocery store.
I said "Yes, I've tried it...the wine I'm looking for is sort of unusual. It's a white cabernet..."
Dude: "Hunh...a WHITE Cabernet?"
Me: "Yes. It's sweet, but not too sweet, and it's not so dry that you feel like you've been eating chalk..."

I grabbed the cheapo wine he was pushing and said thanks and made my get away. I'm wandering around checking out all the stuff they had...Rum from Austin, for the love of Pete! I was interested, because they have all of this stuff I never knew existed...I turn a corner and BAM! Another liquor dude.
Dude: "Hello! I hear you're looking for a WHITE CABERNET?"
Me: "Um, yes. It's okay, though..see? I am getting these instead...I'll just order it..."
Dude: "I've never heard of a white cab..."
Me: "Yes, that's one reason it's so hard to find..I don't know if anyone else makes it. It's very good. "
Dude: "Well, have you looked at our other wi-"
Me: "YES. Yes, I have. I am getting a Gewurtztraminer and a Pinot Grigio.." (I don't give a crap if I spelled those correctly, by the way.) So, I finally extricate myself from the liquor gurus who were fascinated by this holy grail of wine I am seeking. I pay for my crappy wine that I didn't really even want. I start to walk to my car.

As I am walking out to my car, I see a man coming towards me from my right. He was barely in my peripheral vision at that point, and I didn't want to act insane and pepper spray him or anything. So, I kept walking towards my car. He begins to veer towards me. He was altering his course so that we would intersect. Now, I learned a long time ago to listen to that inner voice that tells you something is off. I'm not afraid to holler at a stranger who is acting weird or getting too close. I was much worse about it when my children were small. I'm not as much on guard now. Therefore, as he got closer to me, I tried to be calm and not react. It got to a point though, as I got to my car door, that this man was directly behind me and no more than 2 feet from me.

So, I did what I do: I whirled around and screamed, 'WHAT! WHAT! WHAT DO YOU WANT? BACK OFF!"

He held up a piece of paper with some scribbled writing on it that no doubt told me that he was deaf or blind or something and could I please give him money? Um, no. I can't.

Anyhow, I didn't read it. I just hollered, "BACK OFF!" again. He made a very pitiful moaning sound. He couldn't speak in words, or at least he didn't want me to think he could. Maybe he could, I don't know.

However, it was very clear by this point that I wanted him to leave me alone, and he still was standing there. I realized that he could easily pull a gun and demand my purse, my keys, force me into the car and leave...I wasn't really thinking along those lines at first, but it flashed into my mind in a split second. Who DOES that these days? Who walks up behind people in parking lots and doesn't expect to get shot?

So, he tilted his head much like a confused puppy does and made some moaning sound at me again. I didn't care. I was having none of it. I am serious, if I'd had my gun with me, it would have been bad. I won't go easily if someone tries to take me. I might have actually made a "shooing" motion with my arms, or maybe not. I was acutely aware that I was alone, female, standing next to an expensive vehicle, wearing diamonds, and carrying an expensive bag. Whether or not he KNEW these things, I didn't know, nor did I care. I realized all of a sudden that I was vulnerable. A cell phone isn't going to help a hell of a lot if someone attacks me. I can't freakin' THROW it and get away, for God's sake. They aren't going to wait for me to put my security code in and scroll through my contacts and call someone. So, I sorta stepped towards him in what I think was a VERY menacing fashion. I probably actually looked drunk or peg legged or something. He got the message finally and began backing away and moaning.

Why the constant moaning? Why?

So, I hop in my car, lock the doors and started the engine. I watch the guy in my mirror and he motions at someone. It was some hapless man also leaving the store minding his own business. This guy allowed the moaner to come all the way up to him and show him his card. He read the card, then smiled and shook his head "no". The moaner kept following him. I swear to God, I think he was probably looking for an easy target. I must have seemed like a pain in the ass, so he left me, but he was following this man! Finally, the man turned around and faced him and sorta made a motion indicating that he wanted the moaner to get to steppin'. I don't know where he went...and now I'm thinking I should have called the police. I didn't though. I just drove home.

Was he deaf? I don't know. Was he in need of help? He wasn't panicked. He didn't act like he needed help. He WANTED something, but I don't really much care what he wanted. I kept wondering, if I were deaf or otherwise disabled, would I spend my time in a parking lot in the heat with a ratty piece of paper with scribbling on it and try to approach total strangers? I don't think I would. I think I'd be at a shelter or other facility to help me. I wouldn't be wandering aimlessly in a parking lot. Plus, plenty of people with disabilities such as deafness hold jobs and live perfectly normal lives. They don't hobble around moaning at people in parking lots, for the love!

I give to charities. I don't give to moaners. Sorry, Mr. Moaning Man. Next time, I might have my gun, or at the very least my pepper spray instead of leaving it in the center console of my car.

A Few Things and Rum

I ordered some Pina Colada thing the other day when we were out to eat, and it came with a "sidecar" of rum. Now, I am easily confused by things today. Yes, this makes me sound old. However, back when I regularly purchased alcohol, if you wanted a shot of something, you asked for a shot. It didn't come hanging on the side of a glass. It's sorta nice of them to hang that there, but I don't know if I'm supposed to down it like a shot, or if I'm supposed to add it to the drink and stir it in. You see my conundrum? If you wanted an "Upside down" drink, you had to lean backwards over the bar and the bartender poured the alcohol directly into your mouth, and you stood up quickly (with your lips firmly shut) and shook your head like a dog and then swallowed. Very sluttish, but I did indeed do that on more than one occasion. Big deal. Shut up. I had flaming shots, double shots, all sort of shot, but they never came hanging on the side of a drink.
So, I get this drink and my kids and husband all are staring at it, because these days if you drink ANY alcohol the "DARE" and "MacGruff the Crime Dog" saturated youth views you as a depraved pervert. Anyhow, they were staring at me with digust and disdain, and I didn't care. So, I pick up the "sidecar" and ask my husband..."what, do I do a shot? Or do I stir it into the drink?" and he had no clue, plus he probably couldn't hear me because he hadn't had his skull drilled out, yet. So, one of my kids, who I will deal with severely later, started chanting, "chug, chug", which was dumb since I wasn't drinking beer at a Frat house. More on that later.
So, I took a tentative sip of the liquor in the shot glass. Oh my Dear God. It was like nectar. It was some of that spiced rum. I could seriously drink that all day and night instead of water. It was DElicious! I got all excited and had my husband taste it, and he liked it, too. I didn't let my children taste it, although one of them, and yes it was the one chanting "chug" did ask to taste it and I quite strongly told him, 'NO! It's MINE!" and then I sipped the rest of the delicious rum. Try as I might, I cannot find a picture of this concoction. Google has failed me.
Never fear, though. I am going on a cruise in June, and I intend to drink many more of these lovely little bebidas. I will take a picture of one. Or more.

Next time: I think I'll tell you about the best hand cream in the entire world.