July 11, 2007

July 11, 2007

Ringie Dingie

Yeah, so guess who called me today? That's right! That craptastic airline, ATA! They fucking CALLED ME ON THE PHONE while I was attempting to get some stuff packed before our whirlwind clusterfuck tour of the UK. I HATE the telephone. Let's just get that out of the way right now. HATE.IT. So, I'm annoyed that it's ringing in the first place. I have 3 kids, two of whom are teenagers. That shit should barely get a whole ring out of if before one of the kids answers it. Anyhow, obviously, nobody was gonna answer it, and I look on the Caller ID, and I see (hang on, I gotta look and see what the hell ATA stands for on the Caller ID...) Okay...I see "Amer. Trans. Air 317-241-2221" heheh. Anyhow...I jerked the phone up because I realize that is ATA the butt-munchers. (And that is their phone number if you would like to telephone them for any reason at all....)

Me: *long silence...* "Yessss?"

Poor Perky Northern girl who had NO idea what she was walking into: "Is this ________?"

Me: Yes it is.

(We'll just call her dumbass): Ohhhh...good morning! How are you today?!? (very perky and that Illinois/Wisconsin kind of accent)

Me: I'm Jim Dandy.

Dumbass: Oh. Well, I'm calling from A.T.A. airlines?

Me:..........

Dumbass: Umm...and...uhhh...I'm calling in response to your recent email?

Me: Yes.

Dumbass: Um, well...we at ATA think it is very unfortunate that you had a bad experience..

Me: *Interrupting* Excuse me....my children were lost in one of the world's largest airports because your employees didn't care and nobody would help them. I think that is a bit more serious than "unfortunate".

Dumbass: Uhhhh...could you please hold for just a second?

Me: Sure.

So she is gone for a few minutes and I'm stomping around the house picking up stuff and starting laundry and hollering at kids and doing whatever it is that I do.

She comes back on....

Dumbass: Well...I've checked and it says here that your children were 11.

Me: *Interrupting* and 14..yes, I know how old my children are....is there a reason you are calling me?

Dumbass: Well, when you made the reservations..

Me: *Interrupting* I didn't make the reservations. My ex-husband did. I got to the airport in Dallas, stood in line at your ticket counter, explained to your ticket agent that I was picking up my MINOR children, offered her my copy of the eticket I had printed, along with my identification, and she told me that I could not go to the gate because an extra FEE had not been paid to designate my children as UNaccompanied MINORS. Now, in the eyes of the LAW, my children are indeed minors, and when my husband called 911 to report two missing children, they were reported as minors...my ex-husband was allowed to accompany them to the gate in Chicago, however since a FEE had not been paid so that they didn't have a sign hung around their necks or something that said WE ARE UNACCOMPANIED MINORS...I couldn't go through security, and believe me....security is ready for ME because I bought medicine from freakin' Canada! I would have stripped naked, submitted to a full body cavity search or whatever the HELL they wanted, because I just wanted to PICK UP MY CHILDREN, but hell NO....I DIDN'T PAY A FREAKIN' FEE...and

Dumbass: *Interrupting*: Could you please hold on?

Me: YEAH

I was mad as hell because these dickheads had called me and stirred it all up again.

So, she comes back on the line and says,

Dumbass: "I've checked with two supervisors and they confirm that since the fee wasn-

Me: So help me God, do not tell me that there is not one person in your whole damned company that isn't enough of a decent human being to help two children when they ask for help! My kids asked one of your flight attendants....she said she couldn't help them. They asked your gate agent....he couldn't help them...they asked a security guard...he didn't speak English well enough for my kids to understand HIM...and the person who FINALLY got them was someone I had your baggage agent send out to FIND them. Not ONE person was decent enough to help KIDS????? As a human being if someone asks me for help I'll try and help them! Now if you are just going to keep giving me shit, leave me the hell alone!

And I hung up on her. Bitch. That whole company represents what's wrong with corporate America. That is why domestic airlines SUCK. In general. I've had good luck with Southwest...but you couldn't FORCE me onto a Delta flight ever again. And if you fly A.T.A. ....you're asking for an ass raping.

and I think I like Barack Obama. There. Now I have to get some sleep and get ready for a freakin' 9 hour FLIGHT ON AN AIRPLANE and a two week trip WITH MY MOTHER IN TOW. Man I am pissed off again, now.

Oh..OH! WAIT! THIS IS GOOD! Sanford has so many virus' and spyware on his computer that it is effed up pretty damned good. So, he decided to try and renew his virus shit without asking me for help, right? Hehehehe....and I'm the one that told him he has this shit on his computer...and it's from porn sites...like I don't know...or like I care. He's the ONE man on the Earth that doesn't visit porn sites...oh my GOD!
So, I was telling him..."ok...the deal is...this stuff gets put on your computer and you don't know...it's not like they ask you...but when you go to sites like...gaming sites...gambling sites...porn sites.....it gets put on there, and you don't even know..."
And he got all nervous...and I said, "Oh God..relax...like you're the only man who doesn't go to Porn sites...christ...." So he is now on the phone with some dude in Pakistan or somewhere with Norton Anti-virus because he has his computer so EFFED up. and I won't fix it this time. hehe.
Sweet dreams!