July 29, 2007

July 29, 2007

They want something more sophisticated than a HOT DOG
So. I'm home. We were in the UK for two weeks. I'm sure I'll have to write about it with several blogs. I keep remembering things and saying "Oh my GOD...do you remember so and so?"...anyhow...

1st: If there is a place in the world experiencing a drought...send me a ticket and give me GOOD accomodations and I'll come out. I seem to bring torrential flooding rains wherever I go.

2nd: England is GORGEOUS. Truly. I'm one of those people who get as much as possible out of a place. I'll look at the cobblestones and just holler "What are you kidding me??? These streets are hundreds of years old!!! This rocks!" And I just could sit and people watch and LOVE it, right? I have fun almost anywhere I go. Sanford is the same way. We are perfect travelling companions. We tolerate our kids' company..we figure they are seeing things that they may never see again, after all...and someday, they'll thank us.

3rd: Pubs everywhere. Awesome. Want a pint of good dark beer at 10:30 am? No problem. Pimm's is awesome, too. Love that stuff. Add pomegranate juice to it, and I'm in heaven.

Now....for some other stuff. The flat we rented: the guy who owns it and rents out flats in London is actually French. I thought he was a she until I met him face to face. He is an ex model. How do I know? He had a huge assed catalog full of his photographs...however...they were him 20 years ago. He's aged. (Haven't we all...) Anyhow...since we did a "self-catering" option...we had to do our laundry and there was no maid service. He said the nearest tube station was "about 5 minutes" LIE. FILTHY DAMNED STUPID LIE. We were between London Bridge Station and Borough Station. Both were at the VERY least 20 minutes by foot. No problem for us, but my Mom was with us. My continually complaining Mom. Also, the weather in England is oddly changeable. It is literally sunny and beautiful one second and raining heavily two seconds later. Go ANYWHERE without an umbrella and/or a light jacket or hoodie...and do so at your own peril. The whole flat was decorated from IKEA. Everything. It was in a neighborhood that is going through a sort of urban renewal..so every few blocks it is very nice and hip and trendy..and then you get a section that is like projects. Let's say we were in the projects. I'm sure our flat was like Buckingham Palace compared to the flats in our complex. Also, the stairs outside....people pee on the landings. Why? I do.not.know. If it smells like pee, and it's yellow....it's pee.

We were about 1/2 mile from Tower Bridge and the Tower of London. That was great.

Now...as far as the title of this blog. What the hell does THAT mean?!??! Well, we used the tube everyday. They use the tube for lots of little mini-billboards. One billboard(I do not even know what was being advertised)...said something like: "What we want is somethiing with intelligence, sophisticated..blah blah blah...you know..something more than a HOT DOG.."
Clearly a dig at America. We encountered anti-Americanism WAY more in Britain than in France. Anyhow, my daughter and I were ticked off at it, and I said, "More than a HOT DOG? How about ohhhh....I don't know....Eisenhower?"

Daughter: "Dentistry"
Me: "The Atomic Bomb"
Daughter: "Here's some food for thought...oh wait..they have no teeth..they can't chew..."
My Mom: "The Polio Vaccine"
Me: Eisenhower
Me: Plus, the Germans gave us hot dogs...these people would be speaking German right now if it weren't for America...

This blog has gone on long enough. I've got tons more..both good and bad. We did have wonderful times I have to tell about....
Allow me to say that the country is DIRTY and the people seem to be impoverished and willing to settle for very little and I'm sorry but I'm NOT STANDING IN LINE AT A BAR FOR A FREAKING BEER. I want a waiter....FAST. And they come to ME.
Currently listening:
God Bless America
By Various Artists